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Inexplicably irritating	Inexplicably successful	Inexplicably unsuccessful
Infamous chat show guest	Information delivery system	Infra dig novelty song
Inhibited conversation	Initial for first name	Inland Revenue
Inner city scourge	Insania	Insania!
Insincere	Insipid pop for grown-ups	Insomnia
Inspector Gadget	Inspector Morse	Inspiration for Sheryl Crow
Inspiration for Sheryl Crow song	Inspires fervent devotion from young girls	Instant messaging
Instinct	Insurance company named after them	Insurgents
Intel	International Bright Young Thing	Internet
Internet's good for it	Internet phenomenon	Invaded Poland
Invasion	Invented Christmas	Iran
Iraq	Irish	Iron Brew
Ironic	Ironic nickname	Irresistable force
Irritating	Irritating contestants	Irritating daughter
Irritatingly common	Irving Berlin	Is a dancer
Is a fag hag	Is a muppet	Is it art?
Is really irish but people think is english	Is that still going?	Is this your penis?
Isabella Blow	Isla Fisher	Islam
Island hideaway	Israel	It's a Knockout
It's alive!	It's all done in the best POSSIBLE taste!	It's behind you!
It's best to let them win in an argument	It's dark and they're wearing sunglasses	It's like it never happened
It's too orangey for crows	It will only hurt a little bit	Italy
Item of clothing named after a place	Items made from animals that don't have the corresponding body part	Ivor the Engine
J	J. Edgar Hoover	JFK
JSA	J Arthur Rank	J J Abrams
J K Rowling	Jabba the Hutt	Jack
Jack Bauer	Jack Daniel's	Jack Dee
Jack Kerouac	Jack Lemmon	Jack Nicholson
Jack Skellington	Jack Straw	Jack Twist
Jack the Ripper	Jackanory	Jackass
Jackie Stallone	Jackie Wilson	Jackson 5
Jade Goody	Jail bait	Jainism
Jake Gyllenhaal	Jake the Peg	Jamaica
Jamelia	James Belushi	James Blunt
James Bond	James Bond villains	James Dean
James Hewitt	James Horner	James McAvoy
James Spader	James T. Kirk	Jamie Baldwin
Jamie Callum	Jamie Oliver	Jamie Theakston
Jamie and the Magic Torch	Jamiroquai	Jan Hammer
Jan Morris	Jane Fonda	Janet Street-Porter
Janice from Friends	Janice from friends	Janis Joplin
Japan	Japan's gift to the world	Japanese pranks
Jareth	Jarvis Cocker	Jason Biggs
Jason Donovan	Jason Orange	Jasper Carrott
Jasper Conran	Jaws	Jay
Jay Kay	Jazz	Jazz aficionado
Jean-Claude Van Damme	Jean Charles de Menezes	Jean Reno
Jean Renoir	Jeans	Jedi
Jeff Wayne	Jefferson Hack	Jeffrey Archer
Jeffrey Holland	Jeffrey Lewis	Jellyfish
Jemini	Jennifer Aniston	Jennifer Garner
Jennifer Lopez	Jennifer Saunders	Jenny Frost
Jenson Button	Jeremy Beadle	Jeremy Deller
Jeremy Kyle	Jeremy Paxman	Jerry
Jerry Nolan	Jesus	Jesus Christ! It's a Lion! Get in the Car!
Jesus H. Christ	Jethro	Jewellery
Jewish	Jill	Jill Dando
Jilted John	Jim Carey	Jim Carrey
Jim Davidson	Jim Morrison	Jimbo Wales
Jimi Hendrix	Jimmy Carr	Jimmy Carter
Jimmy Corkhill	Jimmy Nail	Jimmy Page
Jimmy Pop	Jimmy Riddle	Jimmy Saville
Jinxed shoot	Jo(h)nsons	Jo Brand
Joan Collins	Joan of Arc	Joanie Loves Chachi
Joanna Lumley	Joanna Newsom	Job Center
Jockey	Jodie Foster	Jodie Marsh
Joe Dolce	Joe Flanigan	Joe Meek
Joe Orton	Joe le taxi	Joey Deacon
John	John Alford	John Belushi
John Betjamin	John Betjeman	John Bolton
John Cale	John Cleese	John Craven
John D Rockefeller	John Denver	John Diamond
John F Kennedy	John Grisham	John Hargreeves
John Hunt	John Hurt	John Keats
John Kerry	John Lennon	John Leslie
John Major	John Malkovich	John McCririck
John Nettles	John Noakes	John Osborne
John Paul Getty III	John Peel	John Prescott
John Robie	John Sessions	John Sheppard
John Stalker's dog	John Travolta	John Wain
John Waters	John Wayne	John Whip
Johnny B. Goode	Johnny Cash	Johnny Depp
Johnny Knoxville	Johnny Marr	Johnny Mathis
Johnny Rotten	Johnny Thunders	Johnny Vaughan
Johnny was so thirsty	Joined the dark side	Jolly hockey-sticks
Jon Lee	Jon Moss	Jon Snow
Jonathan Aitken	Jonathan King	Jonathan Ross
Jones the Steam	Joni Mitchell	Jordan
Jordan and Peter	Joseph	Joseph's Amazing Technicoloured Dreamcoat
Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat	Joss Stone	Journalist
Journey South	João Bom	Jubbly
Judaism	Jude Law	Jude the Obscure
Judy Blume	Judy Garland	Jugs
Juicy couture velour tracksuits	Julia Roberts	Julia Sawalha
Julian Lennon	Julian McDonald	Julian Mcdonald
Julie Andrews	Julie Burchill	Julie Christie
Julie London	Juliet Capulet	Juliette Lewis
Juliette and the Licks	Julius Caesar	Jumping on my tutu
Jupiter	Just Like Heaven	Just a Minute
Just say no	Just say yes	Justin Timberlake
K.I.T.T.	KFC	Kabbalah
Kajagoogoo	Kalifornia	Kangaroo
Karaoke	Kareem Abdul-Jabbar	Karen Carpenter
Karl Howman	Karl Lagerfeld	Karl Marx
Kate Bush	Kate Moss	Kate Thornton
Kate Winslet	Katey Sagal	Kath And Kim
Kath Day-Knight	Kath and Kim	Kathy Burke
Katie Holmes	Kays	Kazaa
Keane	Keanu Reeves	Kebab
Kebabs	Keen as mustard	Keen golfer
Keeps changing name	Keeps winning awards despite clear lack of talent	Keeps you awake at night on holiday
Keira Knightley	Keith Allen	Keith Chegwin
Keith Richards	Kelly Bundy	Kelly Osbourne
Kelsey Grammer	Ken	Ken Dodd
Ken Livingstone	Ken Russell	Kenneth Clark
Kenneth Clarke	Kenneth Williams	Kenny
Kenny Everett	Kermit	Kermit the Frog
Kerry Katona	Kevin Smith	Keyboard wizard
Keyop	Keyser Soze	Kia-ora
Kid Creole and the Coconuts	Kid Rock	Kidnapped
Kids love it	Kiefer Sutherland	Kill Bill
Killed by a celebrity	Killed by aliens	Killed his brother
Killed lots of English people	Killed people	Killed self by accident
Killed spouse	Killing spree	Kills what he is named after
Kim Basinger	Kim Cattrall	Kim Wilde
Kimberly Quinn	Kind to animals	Kinds of underpants
King	King Cnut	King Harold
King Kong	King Ludwig the Mad	King Raedwald
Kinky Friedman	Kirk Douglas	Kirk Stevens
Kirsty MacCall	Kirsty MacColl	Kit
Kitchen devices that serve only one useful purpose	Kitsch	Klaus Nomi
Knight	Knight Rider	Knightrider
Knights	Knob	Knobhead
Known by a single name	Known by single name	Kobe beef
Kofi Annan	Kojak	Konnie Huq
Kooky	Kool & the Gang	Koumpounophobia
Kris Akabusi	Kris Huber	Kriss Akabusi
Krist Novoselic	Kryten	Kursk
Kurt Cobain	Kurt Waldheim	Kyle
Kylie	Kylie Minogue	LED
LFO	LMAO	L Ron Hubbard
Labyrinth	Ladies of the night	Lady Jane Grey
Lady Victoria Hervey	Lafayette Ronald Hubbard	Lager
Laika	Lambrini	Lambs
Landing strip	Landlocked	Landmines
Language, Timothy!	Lantern jaw	Lapdance
Lara Croft	Lara Flynn Boyle	Lard
Large Organ	Large Penis	Large black square things
Large erection	Larry Sanders	Las Vegas
Lasso	Last of the Summer Wine	Last of the summer wine
Lasts an unnecessarily long time	Latent transvestite	Lauded music video
Laughing stock	Laurel and Hardy	Laurence Llewelyn-Bowen
Laveranues Coles	Lawn	Lawrence S Eagleburger
Lawyers	Lazarus	Lead singer has a beard
Leaping into water	Leather jackets	Leather trousers
Leaving Las Vegas	Led Zeppelin	Led his woman astray
Lee Chapman	Lee Evans	Lee Harvey Oswald
Lee Majors	Lee and Herring	Leek
Leela	Left a beautiful corpse	Leg
Lego	Legs	Leisure activities your parents enjoy
Lemar	Lembit Opik	Lemon
Lena Zavaroni	Lennox	Lenny Henry
Lenny Kravitz	Leo	Leo Sayer
Leo Tolstoy	Leon	Leon Trotsky
Leona Lewis	Leonard Barr	Leonard Cohen
Leonard Rossiter	Leonardo	Leonardo da Vinci
Leprechaun	Les Dennis	Lesbians
Lesbians in a prison	Lesley Ash	Leslie Ash
Leslie Grantham	Leslie Nielsen	Less valuable than diamonds
Lesse majeste	Lester Bangs	Lester Piggott
Letter of the alphabet	Letter people can't agree how to pronounce	Lewis Collins
Liam Gallagher	Liar	Liar liar
Liars	Liberace	Liberal Democrats
Liberty City	Libra	Licence To Kill
Licenced to kill	License To Kill	Lichtenstein
Lies	Life	Life form that lives longer than a human
Lift	Light My Fire	Lighter fluid
Lighters five for a pound, five for a pound your lighters	Lightning rod	Lights up at night
Lightsaber	Like to chat	Liked to drink Dubonnet
Liked to drink gin	Liked to wave his penis around in public	Likes Jodie Marsh
Likes cats	Likes dogs	Likes to wear stripey garments
Lili Taylor	Lily Allen	Lily Savage
Limbo	LimeWire	Limited vocabulary
Lincoln Burrows	Linda Barker	Linda Carter
Linda Evans	Linda Lovelace	Linda McCartney
Linda Smith	Lindsey Lohan	Lines unlikely to be used in more than one pop song
Lion	Lionel Richie	Lionel Ritchie
Lionel Stander	Lipstick issues	Liquid
Liquorice	Liquorish	Lisa Marie Presley
Lisa Scott-Lee	Lisa Simpson	Lisa Stansfield
Lisp	Lists	Litigious
Little Bighorn	Little Boy	Little Britain
Little Jimmy Osmond	Little Mo	Little Nicky
Little and Large	Little green men	Little people
Littlewoods	Liv Tyler	Live 8
Live Aid	Live action / cartoon mix	Live under water
Lived in Islington	Lived rough	Liverpool
Liverpudlian	Lives in Lyme Regis	Lives in a cave
Lives in hotel rooms	Lives in shell	Living Doll
Living elf	Living legend	Living thing part of whose name is another living thing
Living tv	Liz Hurley	Liz McDonald
Liza Minelli	Liza Minnelli	Lloyd Grossman
Loathed out of all proportion to perceived crime	Lois Lane	Lol
Lollipop	Lolo Ferrari	Londi
London	London Eye	London News Review
London Review	London Underground	Londonbeat
Long John Silver	Long arms	Long television career
Look Who's Talking	Look into my eyes, my eyes, the eyes, not around the eyes, don't look around the eyes, look in the eyes	Looking at Medusa
Looking at medusa	Looks a bit like Jimmy Nail	Looks cuddly but isn't
Looks evil	Looks good with a shaved head	Looks kind of weird
Looks like (s)he smells a bit fusty	Looks like a Cluedo person	Looks like a horse
Looks like a muppet	Looks like a puzzled ostrich	Looks like a slug
Looks like a slut	Looks like a snake	Looks like a swan
Looks like a typing mistake	Looks like he smells a bit fusty	Looks like it's going to topple over
Looks nice, tastes horrid	Looks the same turned upside down	Loony left
Lord Flasheart	Lord Lambton	Lord Lucan
Lord of the Rings	Lordi	Lorena Bobbit
Lorena Bobbitt	Loser	Loses a lot of libel actions
Lost	Lost a hand	Lost in Translation
Lost its true meaning	Lost looks	Lost marbles
Lost vocal range	Lots of shoes	Lots of songs with girls names in the title
Lou Reed	Louche	Loud breathing
Loud voice	Louis Armstrong	Louis Walsh
Louise Woodward	Love	Love story
Loved by everyone	Loved by metrosexuals	Loved by schoolboy pranksters
Loved his mother	Lovely tenor voice	Lovely voice
Lowers voice to sound like (s)he cares	Loyd Grossman	Luc Besson
Lucky, lucky, lucky	Ludwig Wittgenstein	Luigi
Luke	Luke Skywalker	Lulu
Lumpy Gravy	Lumpy mattress	Lumpy things
Lunatic in a box	Lung	Lying
Lyn Perrie	Lyndon B. Johnson	Lynryd Skynyrd
Lyrical flow	M&Ms	M*A*S*H
M.A.R.R.S.	M. Night Shyamalan	M6
MC5	MC Hammer	MSN
Mac	Macaulay Culkin	Mack the Knife
Mad-scientist type	Mad as a stick	Made-up languages
Made a mistake	Made in Wales	Made of blood
Made of wood	Made out of skin	Made to make your mouth water
Madman with own compound	Madness	Madonna
Madonna Song	Mafia	Magazine
Maggie Simpson	Maggie Smith	Maggot
Magician	Magma	Magnum
Magnum PI	Magnus Magnusson	Mahatma Gandhi
Mahmoud Ahmadinejad	Main Page	Major airport attached to city nobody wants to visit
Make money through connections to famous people	Makes one feel bad afterwards	Makes one hate London
Makes the people come together	Makes you do the slapping yourself on the head gesture when you remember	Makeup
Making good use of the things that they find	Malandra Burrows	Malcolm McLaren
Malcolm X	Male Chicken	Male singers who are utterly bonkers
Mammoth	Man make-up	Man who looks good in makeup
Man with a girl's name	Manchester	Mancunian
Mandy	Mandy Jordache	Mandy Patinkin
Mandy Rice-Davies	Mangelwurzel	Manic Street Preachers
Manic depressive	Mannered	Manners
Manufactured pop star	Many alter egos	Many impersonators
Many uses	Map of Tassie	Maple syrup
Marathon	Marathon Man	Marc Almond
Marcus Yelp	Mardi Gras	Margaret Beckett
Margaret Moore	Margaret Rutherford	Margaret Thatcher
Marge Simpson	Margo Kidder	Margot Leadbetter
Margot Stilley	Maria Shriver	Mariah Carey
Marianne Faithfull	Marie Curie	Marie du Santiago
Mariella Frostrup	Marillion	Marilyn Manson
Marilyn Monroe	Mario	Maritime disaster
Mark	Mark Durden-Smith	Mark E. Smith
Mark E Smith	Mark Fowler	Mark Lamarr
Mark Oaten	Mark Owen	Mark Thatcher
Mark Wahlberg	Marlon Brando	Marquee Moon
Marriage	Marriage didn't help career	Marriage didn't last long
Marriage helped career	Married a fan	Married just before death
Married to a dictator	Married to a nutter	Married with Children
Mars	Mars Attacks!	Martha Reeves and the Vandellas
Marti Pellow	Martin Amis	Martin Luther King
Martin Sheen	Martine McCutcheon	Marty Feldman
Marty McFly	Marty Pellow	Marty Pillow
Marvin Gaye	Marx brothers	Mary Carey
Mary Kate Olsen	Masochist	Masonic symbols
Mass	Mass hysteria	Massage
Massive Attack	Massive brand	Master Chief
Mastermind	Masturbation	Mathematics
Matilda	Matt Bianco	Matt Damon
Matt Groening	Matt LeBlanc	Matt Lucas
Matt Stone	Matthew Barney	Matthew Freud
Matthew Kelly	Matthew Lillard	Mavis Riley
Max Bygraves	Max Factor	Max Fleischer
Max Mosley	Maxwell	Maxwell's Silver Hammer
Maxwell Caulfield	May contain horse	May contain horses
May have invented punk rock	May or may not exist	May pole
May well have been punched by Alison Moyet	May wipe out the United States	Mayfly
Mayim Bialik	McCain	McDonald's
McDonalds	McFly	Me and My Girl
Mean Mr Mustard	Meat Loaf	Mediocre
Medusa	Meg Ryan	Megalomaniac
Mekon	Mel Appleby	Mel B
Mel Brooks	Mel C	Mel Gibson
Mel and Kim	Melissa Joan Hart	Melmac
Melvyn Bragg	Member of a loopy political party	Member of the House of Lords
Members have to contribute large amounts of money	Memorable TV adverts	Memorable laugh
Memorial to the London Whale	Men	Men In Black
Men who are probably gay but one doesn't quite know	Men who are probably not gay but sure act as if they are	Mensa member
Mental arithmetic	Mentioned in a Half Man Half Biscuit song	Menzies Campbell
Mercedes McCambridge	Mermaid	Message In A Bottle
Met the Spice Girls	Metal Mickey	Metamorphosis
Methane	Miami Vice	Mice
Michael Barrymore	Michael Bentine	Michael Collins
Michael Crawford	Michael Douglas	Michael Fish
Michael Howard	Michael Hutchence	Michael J. Fox
Michael Jackson	Michael Jackson's children	Michael Moore
Michael Palin	Michael Parkinson	Michael Portillo losing his seat in 1997
Michael Stipe	Michael York	Michaela Strachan
Michelle McManus	Michelle Pfeiffer	Mick Hucknall
Mick Jagger	Mickey Mouse	Mickey Rooney
Microsoft	Microsoft Works	Microsoft creating a program that works as it should do
Mid-life crisis	Middle initial doesn't stand for anything	Midge Ure
Midges	Midget	Midsomer Murders
Might make a nice friend, might not	Might want to die if (s)he saw his/her tagberry page	Mighty Mouse
Mike, the Headless Chicken	Mike Donovan	Mike Myers
Mike Piper	Mike Tyson	Mikey
Mikey from Big Brother	Mila Jovovich	Mildly disturbing
Milf	Military terms used by politicians	Milk