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Cars with personality	Carson Beckett	Cartoon
Cartoons	Cary Grant	Casablanca
Casanova	Cash	Casino Royale
Cassandra	Casserole	Cast of Hollyoaks
Casterbridge	Cat	Cat Deeley
Cat Stevens	Cat and mouse	Catalogue
Catatonia	Catch phrase	Catchphrase
Catherine Cookson	Catherine Keener	Catherine Zeta Jones
Catherine of Aragon	Cathy Grant	Cats
Catwoman	Celebrated bottom	Celebrated sneerer
Celebrities spotted in the Grape Street Wine Bar	Celebrity Big Brother	Celebrity Wife Swap
Celebrity cameo on Cheers	Celebrity chef	Celebrity child with stupid name
Celebrity parent	Celebrity sex film	Celebrity tourist attraction
Celebrity with stupid child	Celeste	Celine Dion
Centaur	Central Perk	Central location in a sitcom
Chairman Mao's mausoleum	Challenge Anneka	Champagne
Champagne cocktail	Champion the Wonder Horse	Chanel
Changed name	Changed name after religious conversion	Changed name in an effort to pretend he wasn't from a famous family
Channel 4	Channel 5 is all shit, isn't it? Christ, the crap they put on there. It's a waste of space	Channel Tunnel
Chantelle	Chantelle Houghton	Chantelle Preston
Chapters	Characters abducted by flying saucer	Characters immortalised in LEGO
Charades	Charismatic	Charity
Charles Dickens	Charles I	Charles Kennedy
Charles de Gaulle	Charlie's Angels	Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle
Charlie Chuck	Charlie Parker	Charlie Sheen
Charlie Skelton	Charlie and the Chocolate Factory	Charlies Angels
Charlize Theron	Charlotte Church	Charmed
Charmed life	Chat Rooms	Chat rooms
Chat show host	Chav	Cheekbones
Cheers	Cheese	Cheese and onion
Cheese omelette and chips	Cheesy	Cheesy wedding
Cheggers Plays Pop	Chelsea	Chelsea Clinton
Chelsea Hotel	Chelsea Kayleigh Peaches O'Mahoney	Chemical formula
Chenai from X-Factor	Cher	Cherie Blair
Cheryl Baker	Cheryl Tweedy	Chess
Chesterfield	Chevvy Chase	Chewbacca
Chewin' tobacco	Chewing gum	Chiasmus
Chick flick	Chicken	Chicken Licken
Chicken Royale	Chicken feet	Chico
Chico Marx	Child died in strange circumstances	Child of a millionaire
Child pop star	Child prodigy	Child star
Children	Children's programme that, were you to watch it now, may not be as good as you remember it was	Children in Need
Children pick them up	Children shouldn't do it	Chile
Chimpanzee	China	China White
Chips	Chloe Sevigny	Chocolate
Chocolate Orange	Chow Yun Fat	Chris Barrie
Chris Cooper	Chris Eubank	Chris Evans
Chris Evans' skipper	Chris Martin	Chris Morris
Chris Moyles	Chris Penn	Chris Pontius
Chris Rock	Chris Salmon	Chris Shiflett
Chris Tarrant	Chris de Burgh	Christening
Christian O'Connell	Christianity	Christians
Christina Aguilera	Christina Applegate	Christina Hamilton
Christina Ricci	Christine Keeler	Christmas
Christoper Lambert	Christopher Biggins	Christopher Columbus
Christopher Eccleston	Christopher Lee	Christopher Lloyd
Christopher Plummer	Christopher Reeve	Chubby Checker
Chuck Berry	Chuffed to buggery	Cider
Cigar	Cigar smoker	Cilla Black
City that burned	City with name almost the same as a country other than the one the city is in	Claims to be nice but might be evil
Claims to have secret knowledge	Claire Danes	Clapham Common
Clare Balding	Clarinet	Clark Kent
Classic lines from Take That songs	Classical music	Classix Nouveaux
Claw hands	Claws for hands	Cleaning
Clearly a Morrissey fan	Cleopatra	Clergy of the Roman Catholic Church
Clever lines from pop songs	Cliche papal blessing	Cliff Richard
Climbed Everest	Climie Fisher	Clint Eastwood
Clive Dunn	Clive Dunne	Clive Owen
Clive Sinclair	Clockwork Orange	Closet gay
Clothes	Clothes Nazis	Cloud
Clowns	Cluedo	Clueless
Cluster bombs	Cnut	Coal
Coca-Cola	Coca Cola	Cocaine
Cock	Cockney sparrow	Coco
Cocoon	Coen Brothers	Coffee
Coke	Colchester	Cold
Coldplay	Cole Porter	Coleen McLoughlin
Colin Jackson	Colin Powell	Colin Stagg
Collagen lips	Collateral damage	Collects in corners
Collects rocks	Collin Fry	Colman's mustard
Colonel "Bat" Guano	Colonel Heathrow	Colonel Mustard
Colonel Sanders	Colonel Tom Parker	Colorado
Comb-over	Come on Eileen	Come on down
Comedians who were funny when you were a child	Comedians you found funny when you were a child	Comedic villian
Comedy glasses	Comedy gold	Comedy punk
Comes from cows	Comes in drops	Comes in eights
Comes in fives	Comes in socks	Comes in threes
Comforting	Comic book hero	Committed suicide in prison
Commonly seen hanging from stuff while semi-naked	Communicates via beeping	Communism
Complete change of blood	Completed genome	Complicated sexual psyche
Compliments in nightclubs	Composes soundtracks	Computer language
Concorde	Condoms	Connor MacLeod
Conquered England	Considered unlucky	Consipracy theory
Conspiracy theories	Conspiracy theory	Constantly proclaims innocence
Consumed at Christmas	Contact lenses	Conversations with Children
Convicted killer	Cool 80s show	Cool name
Copyright warning at the start of a DVD	Corin Redgrave	Corkscrew Pig-Dick
Cornershop	Cornflake Girl	Cornish
Cornwall	Coronation Street	Coronation street
Corporal Klinger	Cortana	Cosmonaut
Cot death	Could be a Guardian reader, could be a Telegraph reader	Could be a second-hand car dealer
Could be onto something good	Could be wiped from musical history with no loss to anyone	Could keep you warm
Could watch again repeatedly for hours	Could wipe out the human race	Couldn't eat a whole one
Count Duckula	Countdown	Country name that's great for puns
Coup	Courtney Love	Coventry
Covered by the Flying Pickets	Cowboy	Cplusplus
Crab	Crack	Craggy face
Craig Charles	Craig McLachlan	Crap constellation
Crap remake	Crash test dummy	Crazy Frog
Crazy hair	Creates a fleeting impression you are a giant	Creates a fleeting impression you are a midget
Creates a fleeting impression you are an intellectual giant	Creatures that kill people	Creepy
Cricket	Crime fighting duo	Crime writer
Crimefighting duo with sexual tension	Crimes against humanity	Crimewatch
Crimewatch UK	Crisp flavours	Crisps
Crocodile shoes	Crocodiles	Crooked Spire
Crop circles	Croquet	Cross-eyes
Crossed a river	Crosses	Crosswords
Crucified	Crude	Cruel Intentions
Cryogenics	Crystaltips and Alistair	Ctrl, Alt, Delete
Cubby Broccoli	Cube	Cubic zirconia
Cuckold	Cucumber	Culture Club
Cunning	Cunningly uses reputation as a virgin to make people think, 'Yeah, right, I bet he was at it all the time in the 60s,' when in fact he probably IS a virgin	Cupid Stunt
Curious orange	Curl Up And Dye	Curl Up and Dye
Current events	Custard	Cut off in their prime
Cut off your johnson	Cutty Sark	Cybermen
Cybersex	Cybill Shepherd	Cyclist
Cyclops	Cystitis	DIY dentistry
DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince	DNA	Dad
Dad's Army	Daddy long legs	Daffodils
Daily Express	Dakota Fanning	Dale Winton
Dallas	Damaged septum	Dame Edna Everage
Dame Hilda Bracket	Dan Akroyd	Dan Aykroyd
Dan Brown	Dan Crowe	Dana Carvey
Dancing	Dancing in the street	Danger Mouse
Dangermouse	Dangerous Liaisons	Dangerous Liasons
Dangled	Daniel Beddingfield	Daniel Bedingfield
Daniel Craig	Daniella Westbrook	Danielle Lloyd
Danielle Steel	Danni Minogue	Dannii Minogue
Danny Elfman	Danny John-Jules	Danny Jones
Danny Wallace	Daphne	Daphne and Celeste
Dardenne Brothers	Darius	Darren Day
Darth Vader	Darwin	Dasani
Dated humour	Dated someone with the same name	Dates way out of his league
Daughter in same profession	Dave Dee	Dave Dee, Dozy, Beaky, Mick & Tich
Dave Dee, Dozy, Beaky, Mick & Titch	Dave Gorman	Dave Grohl
Dave Lister	Dave Spikey	Dave Stewart
David Baddiel	David Beckham	David Blaine
David Blunkett	David Bowie	David Cameron
David Copperfield	David Davis	David Dickinson
David Duchovny	David Essex	David Gest
David Hasselhoff	David Hewlett	David Icke
David Jason	David Johanson	David Koresh
David Letterman	David Mellor	David Niven
David Peru	David Schwimmer	David Van Day
David Walliams	Davina McCall	Davy Crockett
Dawg	Dawn French	Dawson's Creek
Dazed and confused	Dead	Dead Or Alive
Dead Russian	Dead actors used in advertising	Dead dog
Dead eyes	Dead in a swimming pool	Dead or Alive
Dead parrot sketch	Deadpan	Deal or No Deal
Dean Gaffney	Death	Death Star
Death of the Queen Mother	Debbie Gibson	Debbie Harry
Debbie McGee	Decapitated groups that haven't died yet	Decapitation
Decapitation strike	Declan Donnelly	Decline to engage in reasonable conversation
Deep	Deep Throat	Deeper and deeper
Defenestrate	Definitely not most beautiful woman ever	Deidre Barlow
Deirdre Barlow	Delilah	Deluded
Demi Moore	Denim	Denis Leary
Denis Thatcher	Dennis Hopper is mad	Dennis Potter
Dennis Rodman	Dennis Taylor	Dennis Thatcher
Dennis Waterman	Dental check-up	Denver
Deoxyribonucleic Acid	Depeche Mode	Depressingly true
Depression	Derek 'Del Boy' Trotter	Derek Acorah
Derek Bentley	Derek Brewer	Derek Hatton
Des'ree	Des Lynham	Desdemona
Desert island	Desmond Tutu	Desperate for attention
Desperation	Despised by George Galloway	Destined to forever live in the shadow of a more famous partner
Destiny's Child	Destroyed Smash Hits	Devon
Devon Aoki	Dexter Fletcher	Dexys Midnight Runners
Dhueieuhd	Diablo II	Diamond
Diana, Princess Of Wales	Diana, Princess of Wales	Diarmud Gavin
Dick Cheney	Dick Spring	Dick van Dyke
Did not have a dam named after him	Did you make a google bomb? Whatever I search for it's you I find.	Didn't We Have a Lovely Time the Day We Went to Bangor?
Didn't You Have a Lovely Time the Day You Went to Bangor?	Didn't actually sing on their own records	Didn't listen
Didn't live up to hype	Dido	Died aboard a plane while still in the air
Died before their time	Died first	Died in Paris
Died in a bathroom	Died in car accident	Died in plane crash
Died in the bath	Died in the sea	Died on a round the world trip
Died second	Died while making a film	Dien Bien Phu
Diet doctor	Difficult childhood	Difficult if you are blind
Difficult question	Difficult relationship with dad	Difficult to defend
Difficult to define	Difficult to do underwater	Difficult to like anyone who wears it/them
Dig a hole	Digit	Dildo
Diminutive	Dimple	Dipsophobia
Dirk Benedict	Dirk Diggler	Dirty Dancing
Dirty Den	Dirty Harry	Dirty protest
Disappointing	Disappointing to re-read as an adult	Disaster movie
Discovered a planet	Discussion points	Disgraced peer
Disliked by women	Dislikes Muslims	Dislikes salt
Disney	Disney Character	Dissolves things
Distinctive lips	Distressed pier	District Line
Divine	Do-gooders	Do the shake-n-vac and put the freshness back
Do you love anyone enough to give them your last Rolo	Doc Hollywood	Doctor Doctor
Doctor Who	Doctor and the Medics	Doctors and Nurses
Dodgy history	Dodgy hobby	Doesn't actually fly
Doesn't have an airport named after them	Doesn't have own line of lingerie	Doesn't mean anything
Dog	Dog bombs	Dog movie
Dogma	Dogs	Dogs playing poker
Doh!	Doll	Dolphins
Domineering wife	Dominik Diamond	Domo arigato, Mr Roboto
Don't ask for it in Wales	Don't forget!!!	Don't hear much about it these days
Don't impress me much	Don't make him angry	Don't make them angry
Don't work	Don Johnson	Don Warrington
Donald Bradman's last ever cricket score	Donald Duck	Donald Rumsfeld
Donald Trump	Done it with Paris Hilton	Done twice in Prague
Done well for herself	Done well without much talent	Donkey
Donkeys	Donnie Darko	Donovan
Doom	Doris Day	Dorothy Parker
Dot Cotton	Dot com	Double-entendres in song lyrics
Double initials	Doubleplusgood	Dougie Poynter
Douglas Adams	Douglas Bader	Down Syndrome
Downgraded celebrity partner	Dr. Emmett Brown	Dr. Henry Kissinger
Dr. Magnus Pyke	Dr. Teeth	Dr. Who companion
Dr Alban	Dr Atkins	Dr Beat
Dr Dolittle	Dr Doolittle	Dr Emmett Brown
Dr Evil	Dr Gillian McKeith	Dr John
Dr Joshi	Dr Magnus Pyke	Dr Mario
Dr No	Dr Pepper	Dr Strangelove
Dr Teeth	Dr Theopolis	Dr Who companion
Dracula	Dragon	Dragon's Den
Dragons	Drainpipe jeans	Drank it when you were younger, wouldn't touch it now
Dread Zeppelin	Dreaded by insomniacs	Dreadlocks
Dreams	Dress	Dressing up animals
Drew Barrymore	Drink	Drinks old people use to get thoroughly wellied on
Drinks that don't exist	Drinks young people use to get thoroughly wellied on	Driving
Drool	Dropped by record label	Dropped from a TV ensemble
Dropping the kids off at the pool	Drowned	Drug dealing progeny
Drugs	Drummer	Drunk
Drunk himself to death	Drunk people hate it	Drunk people love it
Dry off	Dubbed in l'oreal adverts	Dubious expressions of exuberance
Dubious reputation for intelligence	Dublin	Duck
Ducks	Due South	Duet with daughter
Dugong	Duke of Wellington	Duke of Windsor
Dukla Prague	Dull game	Dumb Fictional Characters
Dumbed down	Dummy	Dumped
Dunblane	Duncan Goodhue	Duncan Powell
Duncan powell	Dundee	Dungeons & Dragons
Dungeons and Dragons	Dunns River Nutrition Drink	Duplicate Tagberry pages
Duran Duran	Dust	Dustin Diamond
Dustin Gee	Dwarf tossing	Dwarves
Dylan Thomas	Dynasty	Dyslexia
E=mc2	EBay	ED-209
ESP	Eammon Holmes	Ear
Early AIDS victim	Early porn career	Ears indicate mood
Earth Killer	Earth killer	Earthquake
EastEnders	Eastenders	Easter eggs
Easy	EasyJet	Easy to do an impression of
Easy to knit	Easy to master	Easy to mistake for a different celebrity
Eat soup	Eaten alive by crows	Eaten by lions
Eating a doughnut without licking your lips	Eating a pack of Cream Crackers without water	Eating disorder
Eaton Road	Eats, Shoots & Leaves	Eats rodents
Eats spiders	Ebay	Eccles cakes
Eddie 'The Eagle' Edwards	Eddie Merckx	Eddie Murphy
Edgar Allan Poe	Edinburgh	Edinburgh's greatest contribution to popular music
Edward Brayshaw	Edward I	Edward II
Edward III	Edward Woodward	Edwards Scissorhands
Edwina Currie	Eerily feminine voice	Eeyore
Egg	Egg and spoon race	Egg timer
Ego	Egypt	Eiffel Tower
Einstein a go-go	Elaine Lordan	Electronic
Elephant	Elephant & Castle	Elfin
Elizabeth Duke	Elizabeth Hurley	Elizabeth I
Elkie Brooks	Ellen MacArthur	Elliot Gould
Elliott Gould	Elliott Smith	Elmer Fudd
Elton John	Elusive men	Elvis
Elvis Presley	Email	Embarassing children
Embarassing family	Embarassing parents	Embarassing to buy
Embarrassed self in documentary	Embarrassing situations	Embarrassing to buy
Embarrassing to fancy	Embarrassingly frank	Embouteillage
Emilio Estevez	Eminem	Emmerdale
Emmy-Kate Montrose	Emperor's new clothes	Empire City
Empire Records	Emu	Emu's Pink Windmill Show
Encourages people to tell stories of sexual misadventures	Endearingly unintelligent	Endless succession of shit cover versions
Ends in -bo	Engelbert Humperdinck	Engelbert Humperdink
Engenders violent thoughts in the user	English Civil War	English person married to an American
English seaside resort	English teachers will tell you it is not the same as weight	Englishman living in USA
Enid Blyton	Ennis del Mar	Enola Gay
Enormous forehead	Entertainer dabbling in politics	Entertainment in medieval times
Entropy	Epitomises all that is bad in broadcasting	Erasure
Eregis	Erewhon	Eric Cartman
Eric Clapton	Eric Idle	Eric Morecambe
Ernest Borgnine	Ernest Hemingway	Ernie Wise
Errant nanny	Erstwhile novelty act	Erwin Rommell
Escargot	Essex	Esso
Esther Rantzen	Eternal recurrence	Ethelred the Unready
Eton	Eton Road	Eugene Levy
Eugene from Big Brother	Eugene from Manic Miner	Euphemism
Euphemisms for unmentionables	Eurovision	Eurovision Song Contest
Eurythmics	Eurythmics songs with brackets in them	Eva Braun
Eva Cassidy	Even Better than the Real Thing	Event everybody knows the date of
Every Little Thing She Does is Magic	Every good film should have one	Everybody except Jonathan King
Everything Counts	Everything is very big there	Evil
Evil Edna	Evil Knievel	Evolution
Ex-con	Exams	Excellent deferral for the self employed
Excessively straight hair	Excessively sweaty	Excuse to sell greetings cards
Executed by Communists	Expensive	Expensive and common consumer items
Experiencing an irritating over-enthusiastic revival	Exponential growth	Extinct
Extinct gameshows	Extra	Extras
Extremely gay	Extremely rich	Eye
Eye patch	Eyebrows	Eyebrows indicate mood
F-Word	F00	FPS
Face	Face Off	Face too big
Facial features God threw together after a night out on the piss	Facial features God through together after a night out on the piss	Fact-based
Fag voice	Failed chatshow host	Failed solo career
Failing marriage	Faith Brown	Fake accent
Fake bands	Fake cyclist	Fake hair
Fake lesbians	Fake military rank	Fake space mission
Faked their own death	Falco	Falkland Islands
Falklands War	Fallen madonna with the big boobies	Falling from a great height
Fame	Fame Academy	Family Fortunes